Today, I’m trading places with the mean mom were visiting with. She’s hanging out here and I’m over at her place today!
I’m excited to introduce you to Lori Wildenberg! We met while speaking at a conference in Florida last year and her heart for moms is contagious. She’s the author of TWO books and understands the highs and lows of parenting well. Make sure you read to the end…her books are a MUST-HAVE for moms and I’ve included images and links below.
Lori is the mom of four grown kids. Like all of us, she’s struggled with the balance of being a marshmallow mom and finder her inner mean mom.
I live in the foothills of the Rocky Mountains, near Red Rock Ampetheater in Morrison, Colorado. Tom and I have 4 kiddos- now all young adults.
Tell us, Lori, are you a mean mom or a marshmallow mom?
When my kids were younger I fell more into the mean mom category. I could make the tough choices- but I wasn’t always good at picking my battles. Sometimes I was a mean mom when a marshmallow mom would do. I needed to lighten up a bit.
What’s the toughest mean mom decision you’ve had to make recently?
We have a car for my young adult daughter to use. The agreement is we pay for the car and insurance. She pays for the upkeep and gas. The other day she mentioned she didn’t have much money and wondered if we could help her out with the oil change. I told her, “Being an adult is filled with tough choices, sacrifices, and lots of responsibilities. I have every confidence you will figure out how to pay for the car’s oil change.”
What mean mom wisdom can you share with moms? If you’re a marshmallow mom what’s the best mean mom wisdom you’ve been given?
Pick your battles. The important battles have to do with morals, values, faith, and safety. Don’t worry so much about behavior being “perfect”- focus on long term goals like character and relationship building.
Has being a mom changed the way you look at God?
Yes. Being a parent helps me understand both the kindness and sternness of God. How he loves me and grieves when I step off the path– rejecting his best for me.
Is there a mom in your life who encourages you? Why?
My own mom and one friend in particular. (then many others whom the Lord brings into my life at different times.) No matter what my mom is doing she will drop everything to spend time to talk with me. Once I even called her at 11 pm because I was upset about my daughter being left out of a peer group activity. A friend of mine also helps me keep life in perspective. She is a little further down the road and has lots of wisdom.
Lori, what’s your FUNNIEST mean mom moment?
I had taken some gum away from my son, wrapped it up into a piece of Kleenex and put it in my purse. I forgot about it. A week later I dabbed my nose with a Kleenex and at the same time sniffed. The wad of gum (spearmint as I recall) got sucked right up into my nose. When this happened I was sitting with a group of women in a circle discussing our bible study. Maybe that is more embarrassing moment but now the memory makes me laugh!
Do you have a favorite mom verse?
(I have two)
Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” Matthew 19:26
But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart Luke 2:19
How do you keep your husband/marriage priority?
Honestly that is a struggle. We were so crazy busy with the 4 kids, had all within 5 yrs, that I’m not the best person to ask. But we really have tried to support each other in front of the kids – although we are not perfect at this for sure) and to talk to and about each other with respect. (again not perfect)
Can you name a book that’s inspired you as a mom?
Other than the Bible, it would have to be The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom. Although it isn’t a parenting book- it is a book filled with examples of how to trust God in the circumstances. The principals in the book have impacted my parenting more than any other book. It is filled with wisdom.
Do you have a favorite website you can turn to for help with your mothering?
One website that has been helpful to me is Mark Gregston’s. But since I am more on the other side, having grown kids, I participate as a mentor mom or parent educator/coach in a few sites that offer great encouragement to parents: 1Corinthians13Parenting.com and www.themominitiatiave.com and the Moms Together facebook page.
What kind of mom-legacy do you hope you leave for your children?
I pray that each one develops a strong faith in Jesus. I pray that they will use their gifts and abilities to glorify God and love others. I pray they can show grace, love, and forgiveness, and … speak (God’s) truth even when (especially when) it is hard.
Thanks for hanging out with us, Lori!
If you want to follow Lori, I’ve included LOTS of ways to do that below. PLUS her AMAZING books. Just click on either one and you’ll be able to purchase on Amazon.
Twitter: @loriwildenberg or @1C13P